User blog:Mrpietcaptain/Caligula vs Joffrey Baratheon: Epic Rap Battles of Holy Fuck Piet made a Battle
Oh boy, i'm back with another one of my fanmade battles which i post very frequently. In this installment, infamous emperor of the Roman empire, Caligula, battles against the Lord of the Seven Kingdoms, Joffrey Baratheon. So without further ado, let's start. Ahem EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HOLY FUCK PIET MADE A BATTLEEEEE!!!! VERSUS!? BEGIN? (start at 0:12) Emperor Caligula: This full-blood Lannister can only claim the debt he'll pay to my wrath When I seize a victory, not even Neptune will stand in my path Like Nero, I'll have you burning with Wildfiery rhymes while I diss You're spoiled by mommy with a brain even smaller than your uncle is. I'm the son of a great general, with military strength and strategy to go Aegon on your Seven Kingdoms and have them romanized rapidly You're a figurehead. The hand of the King's Landing all the important strikes You just scream for heads on spikes since "the King can do as he likes" The projects I've been constructing show that I got my empire peaking Not a real BaraTheon but this dickless halfwit is still Reeking of defeat. But let me see what the King and his Cousil can do 'Cause I'll be surprised if Varys doesn't whisper all your raps to you Joffrey Baratheon: Expand into the west-eros and my bannermen will send you packing You will shake in your Little Boots like your epilepsy is attacking I sit on the iron throne with an iron fist, the best to ever reign And I'm spitting sicker than the illness that turned you batshit insane I'll take shots like a crossbow if a Trial by Verbal Combat shall be Check the War of the Five Kings and the fates of those defying me Keep your Praetorian Guard up. For making enemies you have a knack. Both commoners and senators, that'll prove a huge stab in the back Tiberius should've ridden himself of you the first chance that he got Your family has endured more torment than the Starks was ever brought You're nothing but my fool, Commodus, but I'm not entertained enough So you keep your head in the game or I'll have Ser Ilyn bust it off Emperor Caligula: It's blasphemy to speak to a deity like me in such a way. So best cower out of this battlefield like you did at Blackwater Bay. Suetonius wrote about my accomplishments for the next generation Yours are put on paper too but they're from a fatty's imagination Hailed as a star when I got named while you got welcomed by rebelling Protector of a realm but you can't protect yourself at your own wedding His disGrace Draco of House Malfoy is just a royal pain I'll have a triumphal arch built 'cause another Mad King has been slain Joffrey Baratheon: That horse you want as consul would do better in politics than you if you didn't have it killed already, scared it would overthrow you too Leaders of Rome before you would shiver if they knew you succeeded But you're forgettable, so a Damnatio Memoriae ain't needed In this Storm of Swords you receive a lyrical Ides of March from me Keep boning your own sisters, I'll rule strong with Lady Margaery Now that I've brought a hell upon Romans worse than Mt. Vesuvius The loss must sting like when your people slaughtered you like Julius who won? Caligula Joffrey Baratheon So yeah, this has been another one of my fanmade battles. If you have any questions about any lines you don't get you can of course always ask. Category:Blog posts